Baby It's Cold Outside

This song keeps getting stuck in my head and whenever I start singing it Amelia and Landen go around the house singing "Baby it's cold outside..." Love it! Amelia just asked to hear it again!

Merry Christmas!

Everyone have a Blessed & Merry Christmas! We will be celebrating with family the next two days.

Wordless Wednesday: Drawings

Drawings by Landen

Landen in a zipped up red shirt

Dad

Mommy... "she still has a big belly". LOL!

Twinkies!

This is my brother Adam & Brennan... everyone has been telling me that Brennan looks just like him!

Tis the Season

This Advent season has passed so quickly compared to other years. Usually I feel like I'm sitting there waiting and waiting for Christmas to come.. like a little kid. This year -- it's the 22nd and we still don't have everything done. Insane! I never wait this long..I'm going to blame it on having three children under four and a husband that had no vacation with the new job. Hey, makes me feel better. Kurt and I left the kids Saturday and got a lot of the last few things finished. People are beyond irritating but we managed with a very fussy baby. Can I just say.. thank you for online shopping (where I did a lot).. all you have to get mad at is the slow connection. Ha ha! Other than gift giving and a bit stressed about getting everything done, I've been calm and cool about the other things that tend to get me worked up. We will be where we need to be whenever we can get there and that's that!

On to the project news... Amelia's room is coming along slowly now. We've been so busy on the weekends and I don't dare go and pick carpet out in this madness so it will wait. Things are slowly getting up on the walls though. Kurt decided to remove the hallway carpet to check out the hardwood underneath. Most of it looks pretty good, so we might be fixing it up a bit and leaving it without and then painting the walls. I hope we can get that all done in January. I feel like our house is out of order or something. Argh!

Here's a thinker from Landen! Yesterday he was playing with his cars and told me that the police/ambulance had two dead people in it because they got in a wreck. He went and "dumped" them in the ground and said they were going to heaven because they were good people to be with God. I thought that was good.. then he says... "Mom, God kills people that are bad" Me: "No, God loves everyone even if you're bad" Landen: "No, he kills them when they're bad" Me: "No, God always loves you no matter what, he doesn't want you to do bad things because he wants to live in your heart, but he always loves you and doesn't kill people" Landen: "Well that Noahs Ark book said he killed all the bad people" Me:(hmm) "Well sometimes people write things in books that aren't always true." Landen: "Okay." I was surprised at that, I wasn't sure what to say at first. He's also becoming quite the artist.. he drew Kurt, myself and himself the other day -- a typical four year old drawing I think. Then yesterday he drew a combine on a semi trailer for his grandpa. Oh and he can write and spell his entire first and last name. =)

Amelia is ready for Christmas - or should Amelia say "Jesus's birthday and he's going to hog down his cake!

That's the news for today!

WW: Family Picture

Thanks to my soon to be sister in law for sending me this. We rarely get a family picture that we are all actually looking at the camera.

A New Baby!

My sis finally had her baby - one week over due. Liam Joseph 7 lb 14 oz and so adorable! Looks nothing like my kids, which for some reason I thought he was going to look like them. =) Strawberry blonde hair... too cute. I'm so glad Brennan is going to have a cousin so close to him in age.

We've been busy preparing for Christmas here. I still don't have all my Christmas shopping done but we're getting there.

We weighed Brennan yesterday and he's a big 19 pounds and almost 4 months. Honker! He's so stinking cute. I also decided last night when Brennan screamed almost the entire drive home (an hour) that letting your child cry it out is like abuse. How can you hear you baby cry and not comfort them? Seriously!

Do babies get to a certain age and drool a lot even if they aren't' cutting teeth? Brennan chews on me, on his fingers and is a drooling machine.

Could we be going stir crazy already? I can't stand sitting around doing nothing and the kids are horrible when we just sit around. I think we need to be going out more.

Brennan is telling me it's time to get off of here and Landen & Amelia need to have "rest" time. Adios.

Quote

"The first time I received the Eucharist I was in my mother's womb."

Just Pictures

One of many attempts at a photo for Christmas. Needless to say hardly any of them turned out all that well. Someone always has to make a weird face. On another note, why do all my photo's look grainy when I upload them on blogger?

Landen is at that age where he'll never do a nice face when you want him to take a picture. Always something goofy.

Brennan looking manly in his flannel.

Landen, Amelia and I posing for pictures. We're weird.

Amelia, she could definitely be a model!

Yes, I'm Alive

Wow, time does get away from you - over a month since I last posted. No wonder I've been getting emails asking if I'm alive! =) Thanks to those of you who have been thinking about me. Honestly I've just been busy - doing what... well nothing in particular just living life and staying busy with three little kids. Some updates..

*Brennan is still doing better but still cranky and a handful. Nothing really makes him happy, just doing something different often.

*My sisters baby shower was fantastic. I loved it and I think many other people did as well. I will try to post some pictures one of these days. She was due yesterday so now we wait!

*We are updating and fixing up Amelia's room. The walls are painted brown and pink and adorable. We need to decorate and get the new carpet -- so much better than before. Before & after photo's will come.

*I decided to update Amelia's room because she started sleeping in her own big girl bed about three weeks ago. She is doing great and loves it. She's completely potty trained as well - I've been putting a diaper on her at night but it's not necessary because she hardly ever wets.

*We've been doing a little 'school work' nearly everyday. Landen likes it a lot and it gives him an activity to look forward to. Along with some sort of craft that we've been trying to do a few times a week. Landen & Amelia love it!

*We put up our Christmas tree and decorations the weekend after Thanksgiving! The house is so cozy when the tree is up and things. I have yet to get or send out Christmas cards. I might skip it this year - I just don't have the motivation to get them. We'll see. Most all of our Christmas shopping is done. I got some killer deals online and then Kurt & I went this weekend and finished up most everything else. We're getting a new computer for each other.. I can't wait for it to get here!

*Mikyla came up last weekend and stayed Friday, Saturday and Sunday. It was nice having her here, just hanging out and helping with the kids.

*As I mentioned before I'm growing my hair out. It's getting there - I can already put it in a little pony tail!

I don't know what else - I need to update more regularly because it's hard doing a catch up post. I'll check out the pictures to post! If I don't get back on here before Christmas .. Have a Merry one!

Someone Stole My Baby!

Yes I am serious... Monday morning someone took my cranky, mad, not happy, screaming baby and left a happy, smiling, normal acting child! Maybe it's too soon to say it, but Brennan is acting like a new person! Changing over night it seemed like - he still cries and hates the car... I mean he really HATES the car (just like my other two), but he actually lays on the floor and giggles and talks to you, he'll sit in his swing and seat without just screaming, he's different and it's wonderful. I'm so glad, maybe he really was still a bit immature. Oh and no, he isn't taking a pacifier either. He was not liking them and if this is going to keep up, we'll just keep it at that. If the "cranky" one returns then we'll be back out on the hunt for a different one! Today I actually ventured out to the library (we haven't been there in.. um.. probably close to six months. Crazy! It was wonderful to get out... a girl from our church was there that I enjoy talking to, so we caught up. She has a little guy that's six months and Danielle came over with her two kids and Landen had a wonderful time. He loves playing with her son, doing "boy" things like shooting and sword fights. =) I felt so renewed coming home from a really good time. Makes me be able to make it through the rest of the day since Kurt won't get home until tonight! =)

Happy Belated Halloween

Halloween was a lot of fun this year! We went to Wood's on Kurt's last day and the kids went trick-or-treating. I couldn't believe how empty the place was. The kids loved it, Amelia was little miss chatter box... asking everyone in her little voice - "you have candy?" Too cute! Saturday we went to Sara & Jake's house instead of just handing out candy here. Landen and Amelia both went trick-or-treating door to door for the first time with my brothers Ethan & Eli. Kurt, Jake & Bob took them and it sounded like everyone had a good time. After wards Sara & I took them to the Halloween Party at the fire station. I remembered going when I was a kid and loved it, so I was anxious to take them. Unfortunately the kids had to eat for some reason before we could leave (ha ha) so we missed Amelia & Landen's costume judging. Landen was SO upset, but they did have an over all judging, and Amelia won second place. I think it just had to do with her "cuteness" because her home made witch costume wasn't the most amazing thing ever. Ethan won third place as Indiana Jones! After the fire station party we came back and did bobbing for apples and a couple of other games. It really was a lot of fun, I love getting together with family! And good thing we changed the clocks for that extra hour of sleep because we were all worn out and got home latttteee!
Landen the Indian & Amelia the Witch

Savannah the witch, Eli the lumber jack, Landen the indian, Amelia & Mikyla a witch and Ethan Indiana Jones.

Landen bobbing for applesMyself... lol! Yes I got the apple after holding my nose. Whimpy!

Why Can't I...

I have no problem telling other people that you don't have to do things hard core, if that's the right wording, but when it comes to thinking that myself... well, I'm a bozo.

A few weeks back I was talking to one of my friends about cloth diapering and she said.. you don't have to be a "hard core" cloth diapering parent. Use cloth when you can and disposable when you can. It was like a "duh" moment for me.. why do I think if I'm going to do something I have to dive in full force? Please, that's insane!

So the reason for thinking about all this is because of Brennan, by now everyone knows he's a bit of a "high needs" baby. Most people know too that I hate pacifiers. Landen never took a pacifier and didn't care for it.. great! Amelia loved hers and it was helpful.. however she has really sensitive skin and the pacifier broke her out. She always had this horrible scab on her face, it breaks my heart to think I gave her that stupid thing and now she has a permanent scar on her face because of it. Well I went and purchased the nuk and binky for Brennan to try after talking to my mom and a solution, going to the doctor, etc. Kurt has been okay with us using it and I keep saying "no" but after much thought about the other kids never getting to do anything, Brennan crying so much, never going anywhere, we're going to try it. Even if it's just for awhile and then we put it away.. we need something to get us over this hump.. and I hope it works!

My lesson for the week.. to keep in my numskull head... you can do things that work for awhile, it doesn't mean you have to do it forever. Same with watching a little more tv one day, not doing the activities one day and doing them the next, using disposables at night, etc! =)

Makes me Keep Going

My mom told me something that makes me keep going even when I want to pull my hair out.

I've been spending the entire time at Mass in the back with Brennan, makes me not want to go to be quite honest. I know I'm there for bigger reasons than being able to hear everything. I've even thought about leaving the kids and going separately but I'd be taking Brennan no matter what so that doesn't matter.

Back to what keeps me going on... At the Baptism my amazing family sat with Landen & Amelia. They did great with them and it was nice for a change. Amelia had to tell my sisters all about the angels at church and what everything is and sang along with everything, knowing the parts of the Mass. Landen told my brothers that he was standing up (when they were supposed to be kneeling) because he wanted to "see" the miracle. (During the ringing of the bells, when I can I always tell them to listen and watch, the miracle is happening.) I certainly never thought they were really listening, after all they don't act like it very often, but I was proven wrong. =)

Time for Change

Kurt accepted a new job! I really have been a bit uneasy about the entire thing, but I have to believe God has a great roll in how all this happened to just fall into place. Things have been pretty unstable at his old job but thankfully Kurt's job has been safe, however there has been pay cuts, lay offs and other things that have made things far from ideal. The new job really presents itself has a great opportunity for Kurt to grow with more responsibilities and make more money. I don't really like the idea of possible more traveling, but they have their own private helicopter so hopefully he'll be back every single night. I don't think our family can function with him being gone for days on end. The job is back in our home towns basically, five minutes from Kurt's family and 15 from mine. Something that really never crossed my mind, I always figured if Kurt were to take another job it would be even further from family, but now we have the option to be very close. So, Friday is his last day and Monday he'll be starting the new job. =) Definitely a change for the best and time will tell what the future brings!

Quote To Remember

Let us never Forget: Love Starts At Home. - Mother Teresa

Lots of Things - Good & Bad

I do miss posting regularly on this blog. I just don't have time, other things take priority over this and dang it, to be quite honest I'm struggling. Random Blahs -

*Three children under the age of four is one hard task to manage. Someone is always needing something... I want to play a game, I got to go potty, diaper changing, I need a drink, screaming, it goes on and on. The kids are good kids but lately I guess I'm not coping well with demands.

*Brennan cries more than he doesn't, the majority of the time. He's gassy or just un happy... Is that what they call a colicky baby? I keep thinking it's almost over, or he'll be fine for a couple of days only to start crying again. I feel bad leaving him in the swing, like I should be cuddling him but sometimes that's what he likes best.I keep thinking in the back of my mind he's being neglected or something.I honestly don't think this would even be a problem if I didn't have two other little ones needing me as well.

*I've been gross mom lately. Tuesday was the first weekday in a long time I was actually able to take a shower, put make up on, do my hair and get dressed before the day was almost over. I can't stand feeling gross and ugly. Thank you to Mikyla for that one!

*I need to get more sleep and attempt to take care of myself as well as the family. Why can't all my children nap at the same time? Or when they do.. I don't feel wide awake and not want to sleep?

*Kurt's work health fair was this week. I found out I'm down to 140 already, pretty dang good in eight weeks for not doing anything and reaching close to 200 lbs again this pregnancy! That made me feel pretty good. Only 15 to my ideal and 10 to be my average size again. I need to start doing something with my belly.. ugh, flab is hard to get rid of.

*Brennan is the fattest thing ever. He's got to be as big as Landen, comparing pictures that is. He has so many rolls, and creases, big cheeks and hands like Landen. He's just so squishy, in Amelia's words. Another little Michelin man. Our two boys so big and our girl the tiniest little thing!

*Amelia is successfully potty trained with a few accidents here and there. She's still wearing a diaper to bed, but wakes dry almost every single time. She looks so cute in her big girl panties, her and daddy picked out. Now, the task of finding pants that fit her correctly that don't scream out... DORK!

*I've been working on Sara's baby shower. It's going to be a lot of fun... I hope. One mix up was with the baby shower invites, I guess since it says She's on her way and is in pink that means she's having a girl. LOL! NO, she doesn't know what she's having! I have to clarify that with everyone coming.

*I miss Kurt. Even though school has slowed down A LOT since one of his classes is finished it still stinks. By the end of the day I'm so crabby and tired it's awful. Plus this week we've hardly seen him at night.. Landen actually asked me today why he doesn't get to see his dad very much. Doesn't that just break your heart?

*I feel really distant to people I used to be closer to.. I guess I'd just rather hibernate and hide than really go out and I've noticed this is happening. Part of me wishes we lived closer to my parents and the kids. Family just gets you, when others can't/don't!

*I'm going to grow my hair out again. I got it cut for the baptism so I wouldn't look shabby, but two years is too long to have the same hair style and it's sneaking up on me here. It grows pretty fast so hopefully by next spring it will be somewhat long!

*Adding some pictures since I love pictures! Why is it so dang cold???

Brennan's Baptism

October 11, 2009 is another date I'm going to try to remember very hard. Deacon Sam was telling us how the date you are baptized is just as important as remembering your birth date, it's a Sacramental rite, when you were born into the church. Guess I didn't really think about that before, so we're going to try harder to remember the kids baptismal days and light their candles each year. I think it will something really special to start doing!

The Baptism was lovely. Deacon Sam is getting older but he's so gentle and sweet I'm glad to have him do the baptisms for us. My entire family was able to come, it was great to have everyone together at once even if it is a bit crazy. Kurt's parents and grandpa were able to come along with one set of my grandparents and my Aunt Judy's family. It was a FULL house, and I wish we could have invited friends but with cold weather and not the biggest house we had to limit it! =)

Brennan was not himself, not sure if it was just the commotion of everyone and reading my mood of running around, etc. He wore the same outfit my brothers and Landen wore. However it was shorts and a t-shirt and it was 30 degrees. Poor thing. I put baby legs on him and kept him in a blanket the majority of the time. Crazy weather! Here are a few picturesBrennan with daddy. He wouldn't let anyone set him down for a picture of him in his little outfit. He was close to busting the seams.. big boy!He finally was asleep and then he was awaken from water being poured on his head. He screamed!
Godparents: Aunt Sara & Uncle Jake. Deacon Sam, Amelia, Kurt, Landen, Andrea & Brennan!

A grump with a message

I haven't been posting much on this blog lately and to be honest whenever I sit down to type all I can think of is really negative things and I shouldn't post about them all. Somethings are left to be in your heart and taken up with God, not sharing with everyone! It's a new season in my life and I just need to remember people and things don't always stay the same, you change, they change. I'm growing because of it.

However, on to other things... after a particularly nice homily Sunday from a guest priest I really left with a message about how you feel much better if you're doing something for others instead of spending time on facebook (and that is exactly what he said) or I should say, he said facepage. lol! I've been trying to keep that in mind, just doing more with my husband and children. The kids and I have been doing a lot of fun crafts and I just need to spend more time with them during the day and more time with Kurt in the evening!

Also I'm excited that this priest will be the guest priest at the Baptism Sunday, I'm glad to have someone I like at such a joyous occasion! I'm so glad to be getting Brennan baptised, it seems like we've been waiting forever and we're having a party afterwards - I heard back from most everyone I invited, I just hope we have a bit warmer weather for people to spread out a bit!

Also I wanted to share this photo Kurt took of me nursing Brennan. I love being able to fully take care of my child be breastfeeding. This was taken for A Mother's Boutique, she'll be showcasing it on her blog in November! I'm not the most elegant breastfeeding mother, but it captures the real us I think. Jeans, shirt, looking somewhat uncomfortable, no boppy, just a pillow, what a joy!

WW: Smiling Chunky Baby

Can you believe he's seven weeks old already? =)

There even with the honks & heckles

The life chain was again this year and once again a disappointment to me. Very few came once again and to be quite honest it made me really irritated for many reasons. People want to say they're pro-life but do next to nothing to even show that they are. Seriously, what is it saying when not that many people are standing out on a bridge with signs for being pro-life? It's saying that not that many people think that way and those that are on the fence about it think - well nobody else is, I'm not either. I'm not sure what it's like at other places, but our town as 2 Catholic Churches and two schools. If you're Catholic you're pro-life, you can't be both Catholic and pro-choice, so why can't people take 1 stinking hour out of their week to do something like this. I don't know, excuses I guess. I do realize that somethings do come up or you can't change plans, but common. These are big parishes and what we get maybe 5 pews worth of people. You know what it says to me, most people don't really care about stopping abortion. Argh, no more negativity - makes me mad.

On the other side of things - we went. Kurt, Landen, Amelia, Brennan and I! I love my husband so much, standing out there with the kids as I walked back and forth to the van with Brennan (who was having a horrible day.) Glad to say he's mine! Also it was great to see those that did come, and some of my family making the hour drive to stand in support as well. I loved that there were quite a bit more children than last year there as well... I think that's such a beautiful witness and teaching them about what's really important.

Watch and listen to entire video!

WW: Uncles Make Best Friends!

Landen's best friends are my two younger brothers Eli and Ethan. He asks daily to see them - here's Eli and Landen walking the canal - arguing over a stick! Ha ha.

Wear Your Baby!

It's International Baby-wearing week, how can I not post pictures??! You can read my other baby-wearing post here. Get on the Baby-wearing Blog Roll and meet other baby-wearers like you, it's more common than you think!
This photo is different with the shadows, I like it. Brennan was so peaceful, how can you not just keep kissing that little head.


Babywearing is even for the Auntees in my childrens lives! Amelia with Mikyla in the Ergo.
We seriously need a child's baby-carrier! Amelia loves wearing her babies and bears. Big girl undies!!!!
Mommy and Brennan, this is how we live during the week. These were all taken this past week. Daddy wears the babies too, I just never get a picture - darn me.

WW: My handsome man!

I missed posting something about our Anniversary back on September 4th. We celebrated five years of marriage and actually went out to dinner with only Brennan! Love you sweetie. Thank you for all the hard work you do for your family.

Our Growing Family!

Finally a family picture! I'm making a photo quilt for review and had to get one, thank goodness because Brennan is growing and growing and I hate to not have one while he's little. We tried to weigh him today while Kurt held him and we think he's already 10 pounds! WOW... he's already out grown some of the cloth diapers I made, I had to adjust the rise on several of them as well. Oh and he's already outgrown clothing - in three weeks. Got Milk? LOL! He's a growing boy! Amelia is holding pop-it's as we call them (those things that go in packages that pop) she screamed if we took them. Landen is being a goof, love him. Brennan has a red face because he was pooping. Ha ha ha! Oh the adventures of trying to get a family shot.

I believe -

Can we go to church, please?

The kids and I ventured out on our own earlier this week. I had to drop somethings off at the church office for Brennan's Baptism and run another errand. When we were getting ready to leave Landen & Amelia asked if we could please go to church. Not exactly wanting to, I listened to my children's request and we went in.

As we walked through the door, only the Parish priest from the other Catholic church in town there both kids made the sign of the cross with holy water, genuflected, entered the pew, crashed down the kneeler and said their prayers. No prompting at all like when we attend on Sunday. After a few minutes of loud prayer and banging of the kneeler, they genuflected out of the pew, signed themselves with holy water and we left. It wasn't much, just a brief visit.

It was nice, it was peaceful! Makes me want to get back to Children's Adoration. =)

Birth Story - As I Know It.

*Part II posted below this post*

I've been meaning to sit down and write the birth story of Brennan since he was born, but that's been near impossible. Of course some things are a blur now but here it goes, as I remember it...

Brennan's Birth Story Part I

All started Monday, August 3rd, 2009 the kids and I played outside a lot that day. I started having contractions that weren't your typical braxton hicks, but figured I was doing a bit too much running around with water balloons and playing in the sprinkler. Evening came and into night and they were still coming and going, but nothing significant. I called my mom the next morning and told her what was going on, honestly thinking we would be having a baby within the next few days. The days went on, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday with the same thing. The weekend came and everything stopped, I was a bit discouraged and now my due date had passed. Monday came and went, Tuesday, Wednesday and then Thursday, August 13, 2009 I woke up at 3:00 am having regular contractions lasting over a minute and less than three minutes apart. With them being that regular I called my mom who also called the other midwife and they were on their way. I remember telling my mom - they don't hurt though, but with them being so close they came. They continued like that for a few hours until they got here - changing positions, etc made things go away. I felt like an idiot - my other two births were so different, I didn't do any of this before - my gosh, when you have contractions you should be having the baby. Right? I even blogged about going to have a baby that day. They checked me and I was 5cm and 80% effaced... horrible... I could have days, weeks to go yet. Ugh! This just can't be, the pool is set up, filled with water, everything is ready. Ahhh! Oh well, everyone went home, Kurt went to work - they days went by again. I was discouraged only because I didn't want to think about it anymore. If I'm going to have contractions then fine, but I felt like I couldn't really do anything because I was waiting on this baby. The next weekend we tried to do some different things so I wouldn't just sit and think about it and yet another week started.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009 I woke up again around 3:00am with those same contractions, lasting over a minute, less than three minutes apart. What to do?? Kurt and I timed them (they seemed to be a little stronger - what do I know by this point?) Called my mom and we decided to have her stay home instead of rushing up here for nothing again. Kurt went back to bed and I couldn't sleep - so I sat on the birthing ball and caught up on blogs that I hadn't been keeping up with much. I went to the bathroom a little after five and . . . what?. . . bloody show. YES.. maybe this wasn't nothing after all. I went and told Kurt and called my mom back. Nothing else had really changed besides that so Kurt went to work, mom stayed home did her thing, kept in contact with the other midwife. What is a girl to do. . . won't this baby just come out already??? The kids got up, fed them and talked to mom again. It was time to get to business. . . Ha ha! The contractions were consistent and I wanted to have that baby that day so the kids and I ventured out on a walk around our neighborhood. Landen rode is bike and Amelia walked or had to be carried - I was drenched in sweat and exhausted from being up most of the night when we got back, but we went on. Landen and I played baseball, I ran up and down our steep driveway so many times I can't even count. If anything I'll bounce this baby out! Finally it was lunch time - BREAK - alleluia. I came in and tons and tons of bloody show, told ya I'd do something. The contractions continued, but didn't seem as strong anymore. Noooo! I talked to my mom, who had just talked to the other midwife and said I can do nothing or I could keep moving and possibly speed things along. What do you think I was going to do? That's right. . . I got the wagon out, made both the kids get in and walked the cemetery. Now let me explain, the cemetery that we walk isn't a nice little flat cemetery, it's huge and it's hilly - big, great walking hills. I pulled that wagon through all but one hill (which I won't even walk when I'm not pregnant) and what happened... NOTHING. The contractions came to a halt.. gosh dang it. We came home, the kids watched a movie and I sat on the birthing ball and did the stair steps.. nothing. Lalala. The UPS came, the kids got the new hamster toys and wanted me to put this together (this was around 3:00pm), so not wanting to (this kind of job is for Kurt) but the kids really wanting me to - I sat down on the hard wood floor and started the task... the contractions started up again and a bit more fierce I do say. Finally a little after 4 I got it all together and Kurt got home. By now I am tired, cranky and just wanted to rest and have Kurt go and get me some chicken nuggets, that's all I wanted was some dang chicken nuggets. We kind of got in an argument, I cried for the first time in who knows how long and made a stupid easy meal. I was ticked off and just wanted to relax... Let me tell you, Kurt and I do not typically fight or argue much really, but when it comes to meal planning, preparing, eating out we do. It's awful! However I do think I had a good reason this time... which he found out later. Ha ha ha! That evening we let the kids watch television while we watched a Law and Order SVU in the other room (something we never do). The contractions were on and off, I called my mom after 9:00pm, discouraged, cranky and tired. I figured I was going to be like my mom and have show for weeks before the baby arrived.. so once we got the kids to sleep it was just before 10:00pm and . . .hello the contractions started in full force.... to be continued.

*Belly a day before baby is born. 10 days overdue. View from the side and the mommy view*

Brennan's Birth II

Brennans Birth Story Part II

At 10:00 pm when I was finally able to lay down to go to sleep the contractions started, fierce and mean. I kept jumping up from bed, not able to get comfortable. They really hurt! I remember timing them as best I could and attempting to talk to Kurt. I kept thinking, they're nothing I'm going back to bed. I did this, laid down and immediately was up again. I don't really remember how long this lasted but standing next to the sink just feeling a little out of control, not knowing how to handle the contractions or anything. I called my mom and told her I wasn't sure how close the contractions were but I just needed her to come. We timed for awhile, called my mom who was already dressed and coming, who called the midwife and they were both on their way. I set up my Our Lady of Guadalupe candle, my lavender scented one, started the music I had all prepared and by the time they arrived 45 minutes later I had figured out how to breath with the contractions while squatting next to a wall and then walking in between them. It wasn't so bad after all.

This went on for a couple hours until I started going into transition - I remember really having to concentrate on the contractions more. The other midwife telling a funny story about her daughter and husband and no longer being able to really laugh and talk much. I found a weird little spot to squat down and started working with the contractions. I don't particularly like this part because I feel like I have no idea what I'm supposed to do. Stand, sit, squat, push, get comfortable or get in a position to make the contractions intense to get this baby out. Of course the last is the good one, but that option stinks. I kind of floated around the room doing this, squatting and really working. I remember them telling me to not waste the contraction but to work with them all to get the baby to come. I wanted to cry, I felt disappointed in myself for just wanting to quit - why couldn't the baby just come out already? I was so exhausted. I didn't remember how to push, what was I supposed to do? I was hating this. By the time I really felt like I couldn't do it anymore, no matter how much I told myself I could - I got into the wonderful amazing birth pool. Kurt was sitting in a backwards chair next to the pool and I was on my knees leaning on the pool next to him. I remember just shutting my eyes thinking how much more relaxing and comfortable the pool was, and that I'm going to just go to sleep for awhile then I can do this, they won't even know. Ha ha ha.. mental. After probably a minute of thinking that I was like. . . what am I thinking? I turned around and asked for them to telling me how to push again - Push like your pooping out a watermelon, okay NO. I had Kurt counting to ten for me so I could push for at least ten seconds without stopping. I remember apologizing because I couldn't make it to ten. Then I remember it just clicking thinking - I can do this, I'm not messing around. I'm made to have this baby and I can do it!The next contraction I pushed and pushed like I was pooping out a watermelon (I love how Kurt has to remind me often about how much poop there is, hey it comes with birth, get used to it), when it stopped I said.. "do you see the baby yet?".. We see about a dime of his head".. Me: "oh no".. the next contraction wasn't much.. the next I pushed that baby out all the way to his eye balls and then a little more so he wouldn't be getting his eyes squished. I remember them asking if I wanted to reach down and touch his head, part of me wanted to but the other part of me needed to continue to work - and this I did. By the next contraction I had my baby in my arms. 3:07am...Woah, that was work! I got him in my arms and Kurt and I just stared at him, thinking the same thing as always.. he's beautiful, perfect, amazing, tears in your eyes a bit. And of course is he okay, are they supposed to be a little purple and is he breathing?? Ha ha, he was completely perfect! I then tried to get him to nurse, he wasn't much interested at first but a little bit. After a minute or two we looked and saw we had a little man and in came our little Amelia and my sister Becca! Kurt cut the cord and I pushed out the placenta. A couple minutes later I, with some help got our of the pool and took a shower while daddy loved up his new baby boy. By the time I was out of the shower things were picked up and I got dressed and into bed. Brennan nursed and then we weighed and measured him and got him dressed. Since it was early I went down stairs and got comfortable on the couch with our new little guy and he cuddled up nursed and fell asleep.

I'm sure there are details and things I do not remember. I remember thinking I did badly with this birth, getting discouraged easily and not wanting to do it, but was told I did great! That's always refreshing. And yes, I want to have another baby - lets just wait a little while. =) I only wish I would have gotten some good pictures of the pool and things. Waterbirth is so amazing, I can't imagine giving birth without it. If you would like to read more information visit Waterbirth International online and here's a video that I really like from their site. There is nudity but it just shows the beauty of birth. This always makes me cry. We are made to give birth and it should be a beautiful experience for us all. God bless!

WW: 3 Weeks Old Today

He may look a little strange with his male patterned baldness that has just recently really become very noticeable - it's definitely becoming a horse shoe shape around the bottom of his head, but I still love him!Maybe he should leave a hat on! lol!

WW: Shoes

I'm not the only one who makes this little girl stylish - Becca has a helping hand! Are these not the cutest shoes ever??

Lazy, Lazy!

We have been having such a lazy weekend - it's actually been really nice to just sit around and do a whole lot of nothing. Brennan has been sleeping so much I've actually been waking him to nurse - I don't remember the other kids doing this but obviously I have the worse memory ever because Kurt seems to remember the others going through a little period like this. Once again he was amazing in church - if I haven't sold you on a wrap yet then you better get one. Ha ha ha!

Becca came up Thursday night to help me with the kids - Kurt is back into the thick of things with school *gag* and it was great to just have her around. Thursday was busy, a lot of people in and out but it was nice to visit. Then Friday Sara and Beck went to garage sales (I wanted to go but I knew I better not stretch myself thin). Beck found some of the cutest little things for Brennan and some adorable shoes for Amelia - yep you can tell Beck and I are related. Amelia owns more shoes than I do and that may not be a good thing. =)

On a sad little note - I really think Brennan finally being here is taking a toll on Amelia. She has been throwing horrible tantrums and as hard as it is for me I'm learning to ignore her. Nothing makes her happy so that's what we're doing. They're just awful - I'm trying to give a little more love to her and hopefully we can get out of this. It makes me sad though.

I'm anxious to weigh Brennan - I'm pretty sure he's grown a lot already and I'm pretty sure I've shrunk down a tad bit. I can finally get most of my shoes back on, a couple of shirts are already to big and I'm going to attempt to get my wedding rings back on tonight. I feel naked without them - they've been off since May. Oh and speaking of wedding - I'm excited for Friday because the man and I will celebrate being married five years!!

Off to be lazy for a few more hours - then the start of another week.

Baby: Doesn't Get Any Better Than This

I broke out my sleepy wrap today for Brennan. What was I thinking not getting this out sooner? I've been using my pouch carriers and as much as I like them, they don't even compare to the wraps. Brennan loves it, fell asleep right away. He feels like nothing on me and my back doesn't hurt. I think I've been straining when I sleep and when I hold him up to nurse because my back has really been bothering me lately, so the pouch hasn't been helping. However, this is amazing!

I'm sure if Brennan could talk he'd tell me he loved it. He's so comfortable looking; I'd like to look that comfortable right now. Amelia has quickly informed me though that these are her carriers - every single one. She had a hard time Sunday when she wasn't going to get to be in the pouch. I'll have to get the Beco or Ergo out for Kurt to wear her around in - she needs some cuddle time. =)

Lastly, if you don't have a wrap - you should invest in one. The Sleepy Wraps aren't that expensive and you can even make them easily yourself (from what I've seen a few of my friends doing - I've never personally made one.) I never had a carrier with Landen - I was way to freaked out about him not breathing and things, but I can't imagine not having them now.

Things Always Get Better

Thank you for all the nice comments on my feeling sad after the baby. Things are going so well. Friday and Saturday were really my low days and Sunday I started feeling so much better. Saturday I pretty much had it set in my mind I wasn't going to even try church - I woke up and changed my mind. Church went amazing - better with Brennan than it has the last few weeks with just Landen & Amelia. I put him in the pouch and he slept the entire time, he loved it! It was even more wonderful to hear a homily all about sacrifice with children and taking care of family instead of falling into the materialistic way of thinking. It was wonderful!

Yesterday was my first day alone with the kids. I talked to my mom the day before and was prepared with family back up so occupy the time. It was wonderful to have my sisters and their foreign exchange student here to help out (especially since Amelia was awake the majority of the night) but I didn't feel one bit icky. Tired, yes but overwhelmed depressed not at all. Today has been going excellent; we woke up did our thing. Amelia is taking a nap, Landen (who should be taking a nap) is loving is brother while he spreads out on the floor. Not one bit of icky feeling and I'm even making a turkey breast from scratch for supper. Things are great - I really appreciate all the prayers and advice so many of you gave me.

As for the cloth diaper thing - we've been using them during the day and they're working great. At night since I'm still doing the whole trial and error thing we're using disposables. Amelia and Landen wake up to every little peep out of Brennan and lets just say he's my first child that hates having a diaper change so we're going with the quick route for now. With that said, when do babies quick pooping at night? Ha ha!

I received a very nice gift in the mail a couple of days ago. Some mama pads to try out - these have been on my mind a lot since Teri did a review for Knickernappies awhile back on my review site. I've been back and forth, but since receiving these I don't think I will ever be able to switch back to disposable pads. I'm not much of a pad person anyway, but when I do need them these will be what I'll be using. They're amazing and definitely not gross like so many people think. I'll be having a review up on October for those wanting to know more. You can view the two kinds I got from my friend Rebecca's site Sprouting Up.

Thanks again for the prayers and thoughts! We're doing fantastic here. The poop machine needs his diaper changed. Landen is getting a kick out of baby toots. LOL!!

WW - Is it even Wednesday?

My days are running together - I can't keep track as to what day it is. Every time I take a picture of the three of them it quickly becomes my new favorite. =)

The Feeling Of Frustration.

I love after you have baby and you really are on cloud nine. Even though you are so tired and worn out from the battle of birth, you look and there is your little miracle in your arms. It's absolutely amazing - and then looking at the picture I posted of my three little loves all together brings tears to my eyes. Until you have your own children you can't even begin to understand that feeling.

However, I absolutely hate the third, fourth and however many days it seems to go on for me low of after having the baby. The feeling of frustration, over-whelmed by everything, anxious, just the feeling of depression. No matter how little stimulation, quiet, whatever I still manage to feel like this. The thought of Kurt going back to work in a few days makes me want to cry. Thank goodness I have the most wonderful family in the world who have all volunteered to just sit and stare at me if that's what I want. I love that!

I'll be happy when this feeling subsides because it really does take away so much and I dread it my entire pregnancy - feeling like that. There is no reason to cry but I always manage to do it. Oh do I hate it. Because of this I decided I just can't deal with the frustration of cloth diapers right now. I have everything prepared for Brennan but his little butt is quite tiny and being so very inexperienced when it comes to newborns in cloth after two days I'm just too exhausted and frustrated to continue. I sent Kurt to purchase the Huggies new pure and natural disposables, they're organic cotton, hypoallergenic and have aloe & vit. E. I don't want to take the chance of him breaking out like Amelia does so very badly whenever a disposable touches her little skin. I'm definitely going to continue to use the cloth though in a week or two - but for now while I'm re cooperating this is the way it has to be.

Other than that everything else is going smoothly. He's a little suckler when it comes to nursing. We nurse several times an hour and cuddle all day long. I'm excited to get the baby-carriers out because I know they are going to be wonderful this time around! I know in time this feeling will subside and just taking care of myself and getting plenty of rest helps. I'm going on and making the best of this. It actually helps to write out how I'm feeling. Does anyone else ever feel like this? I know it's common.

Thanks for all the wonderful prayers and congratulations you all have sent. I hope to write up the birth story soon. God Bless!

Priceless!

We're all in a baby bliss. They love their new baby brother!

Baby is Finally Here!

Brennan Andrew Summers finally decided to make an appearance this morning at 3:22am. He weighs 8 pounds 4 oz, 20 inches long and looks really little to me (my smallest so far), but absolutely adorable! Everything went well and other than being really tired things are good here. Updates when I can. For now I'm off to enjoy him and my family. Thank you so much for all the prayers. God Bless!

I'm liking these things!

I'm up early - of course I'm sure you know why. CONTRACTIONS! Oh well, these are getting to be the "good" ones. For those of you who don't know what a good contraction is.. well. . . Lets just say they're a bit OUCH!

So I'm up and I like being up when the kids are sleeping because I get to catch up on blog reading and not feel guilty about it. Right now since I'm technically on a "maternity leave" from my review blog (mostly doing a lot of emailing only) I've been getting to do a bit more Family Blog Reading! So a few things I'm loving this morning.

This photo that I found on Lerin's site Beautiful Chaos. It made me laugh - great photo. I need this as a true door mat - anyone else?

I read this awhile ago over at Martin Family Moments from Colleen and it made me laugh and laugh. I hate dirty jokes and I'm all about the corny classics's I guess. I taught Landen the age-old - Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road? Ha ha ha! Anyway, Colleen has a whole bunch of great jokes on her site from her kids. Thanks for sharing Colleen. This one made me laugh for entirely too long. - What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm. LOL!

And as always - I always find something inspirational over at Kate's Momopoly - check out this article. Motherhood is not a prison sentence.

Not sure where I read about being a Yes mom but I'm failing miserably. That was going to be my task, and maybe I'm crabby, lazy I don't know. Today's a new day though and I'm going to work a lot harder at it. I hate being a No mom! Have a good day. I hope I get to have a baby update today or tomorrow.

Nothing Yet!

I didn't want to leave so many of you in the dark - thank you for all the nice emails I've received about how we're doing here. All is well - just waiting patiently for something to start up again. Contractions have really backed off since Thursday, unfortunately. Kurt doesn't want to head back to work Monday, so maybe this baby will get rollin' today. After all we are going to have a change in weather, doesn't that affect animals? =)

The kids are getting anxious - Landen definitely knows something exciting is going to happen since he woke up Thursday with people here. Out of the ordinary! Amelia continues to talk about being born in "her" pool, however now she lets us know that "momma's baby in pool too." Landen told me the other day while bouncing on a little ball that he was getting ready to birth his baby that's why he was sitting on his birthing ball. Made me laugh! I once again got groceries to stock the house with, just in case. Watch us eat it all for the -- what, third time?

Hopefully I get to write something exciting soon. We've been sitting around doing nothing, which is probably why nothing is happening. Have a lovely Sunday.

PS. Why is my baby ticker counting backwards? Grr! Oh, and just so "some" of you know. This blog isn't a secret, I'm glad so many people keep up on what's going on with us. Leave a comment or two and when you see me - it's okay to act like you read this. Ha ha ha! =)

No Baby. . . waiting again!

No baby! I was having contractions lasting over a minute that were under three minutes apart only to slow and not progress. Dilated to a 5, 80% effaced - it could be awhile yet. Just going to go on with the day - hopefully things progress sooner than later but it maybe awhile again. Updates later. Thanks for the many prayers - keep them coming. =)

Baby Update!

Looks like we maybe having a baby sometime today - midwives are on there way! Keep us in your prayers. Update when I can. If this is a false alarm I'm not going to be happy. Ha ha ha!

From My Children's Mouths

Kurt set up the birth pool a couple of days ago - we got to be prepared after all. Not a good idea with the two kids there, but it had to be done. Landen's pretty good about listening about not touching, as well as Amelia. However, Amelia has a little bit to say about this so-called-pool she's not allowed to get into.

She likes to remind us daily that it's "My pool, I born in it."

At lunch today we were talking about when the baby will be born, as Landen enjoys asking me every morning - "my birthday is over, when are we going to have the baby?" Amelia also let us know that - "baby in my tummy, born in my pool" and I caught both the kids nursing babies last night before bed.

The whole family is ready!

Think about this one for awhile.

I found this on Modern Catholic Mom's and had to share it because ever since I first saw it I keep thinking about it. Sad!

Preggy Update!

I'm still pregnant - I know what you're thinking, you're not even due yet - of course you're still pregnant. So for the update.

Officially I'm saying I'm due tomorrow because that's the date I'm due according to conception, but the 11th is also my due date so . . . whatever, it's a pregnant thing!

Why I'm saying "I'm still pregnant" - because this little teaser of a child is enjoying making me think I'm going to have a baby just to have everything end. Tuesday I had contractions on and off, nothing real significant but more than just those braxton hicks I was getting every once in awhile. I kind of thought something, but not really - after all I was doing water balloons and running around in the sprinkler/hose with the kids. A little more activity then maybe I should have been doing. Ha ha! That night they continued but not that big of a deal. Wednesday - woke up to continued contractions and called my mom, just for a heads up as to what was happening. They died off a bit but I got what I wanted to get done around here, went to the store, etc. By evening they were quite a bit more intense (if you want to say that) and I could actually time them. Called my mom and decided to get the kids ready for bed. Unfortunately as Kurt was rocking Amelia they stopped completely - Argh! Thursday, nothing really but the regulars like Wednesday. Now Friday, on and off but nothing much.

I'm learning patience - Landen was my first and of course it was going to take forever. Amelia I wasn't having contractions (or at least I thought) and my water broke before I knew what was going on. Now this little stinker is doing all kinds of things. Oh, and so many think they know how pregnancy is when they've only had two - each person is different, each pregnancy is different!

I'm not discouraged like I was a little bit yesterday, just going with the flow today. Hoping I can go out for dinner tonight - that makes a pregnant girl happy! Hopefully I have a post this weekend that I'm in "active/real" labor or there is a new baby boy or girl in our arms! Yay!

*I found this great picture from at Fun With the Friesens!